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Showing posts from November, 2017

Restrooms

Today my wife and I had lunch at a popular restaurant. I asked the waiter where the restrooms were located. It seems pretty simple. I had an Instant flashback about when I could not go to the bathroom alone. When I got out of the hospital it was on my son’s 7th birthday. We went to a restaurant and my son took me to the restroom. I was scared. I had no concept signs or gender. My son guided me to the “men’s room.” Because of my aphasia, I did not even comprehend the alphabet, men’s, women’s, etc. Several months later, I went to a local restaurant. I was so confused and I went into the wrong restroom. I was so embarrassed and I didn’t tell my wife for several months. Three times, I peed in the sink rather than in the urinal. I only noticed when I realize that I was washing my hands where I just peed. Those early days after my strokes were humbling in general. Losing your sense of self is tough. Agonized about the embarrassment of not knowing how to go to the bathroom. It’s been

Airports and Aphasia

In my career I used to travel all over the nation. Navigating airports, freeways and my hectic life was second nature. In October I had to travel three times. I went to the New York City, Denver and Las Vegas. It’s like my old days. And I do not miss it. Practically, the condition of Aphasia is difficult to understand. There are many types aphasia. Right after my strokes, looking at gates in airports stumped to me. For example, this photo of a random gate “B 18” seems relatively simple. However, aphasia manifests itself in different ways. “B 18” did not register in my brain first. I could not understand numbers or letters. Just symbols to me with no cognitive correlation. In addition, “B 18” could be unrecognizable for some aphasia survivors. Instead of seeing a letter and a number you might just see an unrecognizable distortion in your field of vision. I could not drive after my stroke for several reasons. My brain was in a fog and my reaction times made me too scared t

God’s plan for me?

Today I went to Saint Alphonsus Hospital have lunch with a fellow stroke survivor and two wonderful people who work at the hospital. One is a nurse and the other one is a speech therapist. Both of them are saints in my eyes. The speech therapist told me that a 35-year-old man just had a stroke and has aphasia like me. After lunch, we visited him with his speech therapist, his fiancé and his parents. His dad commented that he read a poster about me. I forgot that there is a poster of me on the rehab floor. The basic reason for the poster is to give people some hope. I agreed to do the poster just because I wanted to let people know that there’s always hope. Is fitting that I have lunch with a stroke survivor and his wife who visited me in my hospital room five and half years ago. I thought my life is over. They really comforted me during those dark days. He said that God has a plan for me and it might be giving hope to stroke survivors. And I agreed. We both talked about g