Pandemic and my son....

Yesterday, I was having a conversation with a friend. I mentioned that this dreamlike pandemic has made me even more protective of my 15 year old son. With this great unknown I tell my son and my wife how much I love them. Probably too much.

I started my blog in 2008 as a sort of diary of my son. Since that time, I have posted 331 stories. The focus of my blog changed after my strokes. My first blog post after my stroke was short and exhausting to write. At that point, one of my many therapists made me do some blog posts. It was my homework just like repeating the alphabet and practicing counting.

As my recovery progressed, the blog posts were often dark and angry reflecting my mindset at the time. I would lash out about my angry fears, depression, and the loss of me. It was not until a reporter, Dan Popkey of the Idaho Statesman, told me that my blog was part of his research when the newspaper published a story about me. I realized that my angry rants were actually being read!

Through all of those years and posts, the initial purpose of my blog faded away. The focus of the blog was about ME not my son. In addition, my wife took on the traditional care giver role: Long suffering and underappreciated.

The reality of this pandemic has certainly made me think about my priorities. “Sheltering in place” made me yearn to hug my son all of the time. My wife is also the caregiver for her mother, and she has had deal with the stress of worrying about Mark and Ethan plus her elderly mother who is overwrought about the pandemic.

Honestly, I have enjoyed “hunkering down” with my son and my wife. I have joked on Facebook that I walked my son to school after spring break my waking him up so he could walk the 35 feet from his bed to his desk. I feel so safe because he is always in the next room.

My son is lucky. As a 9^th grader, his private high school started to deliver a full schedule on line through Zoom. Of course there are there are glitches, but better than the alternative.

In this situation, I am even more protective of my son. Despite school work, 15 year old emotions, and the boredom of mandatory isolation, I will miss this situation in some ways. My son is home. He is safe. He is laughing in the other room playing video games with his buddies.

Yesterday, my son bought a small trailer for his lawn mowing business. We helped him put it together. We laughed and joked. I enjoyed watching him read the instructions and putting it together. Despite the quarantine and the "doom and gloom" nature of this pandemic, I will always remember that night when the world just took a breath. It is the little things in life that are the most important.

Like every parent, I wonder about his future. What will he become? Will he be safe “out there?” He is a good son and I love him. I cannot protect him from the unknown yet I am protecting him right now during this unreal situation.

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Linda Cooper said…

I can identify with you about this time being a bit of a reprieve at home. I live with two adult daughters and my retired husband and I am enjoying a lot of this time with them. On the other side though, I am a part-time health care worker and I worry every day at my job and pray that everything is going to stay okay for our residents.

May 20, 2020 at 12:26 PM

Dunham Family and My Stroke Story!

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