Diminished Capacity and Communication

When you have a stroke, you need to rely on others for many things. Simple tasks are sometimes in insurmountable like tying a shoe, making dinner, personal hygiene, etc.

When you have a stroke, people want to help you which is great though sometimes a stroke survivor needs to do things for themselves.

But sometimes, “people” who are most often the most close to you, seem to take for granted that survivors do recover and they have opinions which are real, well founded, rational, intelligent, and have value.

It is often the case that a survivor has to deal with well-meaning people – friends and family – who seem to believe that because an individual who had a stroke is less intelligent.

When a survivor has a different opinion, it is easy for these people to say something like “well, he had a stroke you know, just humor him.”

In the eyes of others, you are less than a real person….you have diminished capacity on all fronts.

It a survivor objects about even mundane things, the people simply whisper that “before the stroke he would not have done this or that.” When you have communication issues because of the stroke, it is especially because you just cannot find the words to make a point.

When a survivor has to deal with this very real factor, it is hard to relate: Is this because of the stroke? Are my different opinions valid? Maybe I am not smart after all. Maybe everyone is humoring me?

I have talked to so many survivors who have the same sentiments: Take us seriously rather than taking us for granted.

Comments

The Two Faces of the American Dream

The massive wave of Norwegian immigration to Minnesota from the 1850s through the early 20th century wasn't a casual choice; it was an escape from crushing land scarcity and economic desperation. My ancestors, the Dunhams, arrived in 1851 and built a life in Otter Tail County in Minnesota. My great-great-grandfather, Jens Christian Dunham, didn’t just survive—he thrived. He served in the Minnesota legislature as a Republican from 1888 to 1890 and later became a staunch advocate for President Teddy Roosevelt. He was the literal embodiment of the American Dream: an immigrant who fled poverty to become a lawmaker in his new home. Fast forward a century, and a new wave of immigrants—this time from Somalia—is following that exact same blueprint. Like the Norwegians before them, they fled hardship to build a future in Minnesota, and many have run for office to serve the state that welcomed them. Yet, the political rhetoric surrounding these two groups couldn't be more polarized. Don...

Phantom Blindness and Taking a Break after Strokes

I met with my eye doctor last week about taking some time off from my vision therapy. I have been doing therapy since my stroke almost two and a half years ago. I am tired, and a need a break. My doctor said, “This is completely understandable. Take some time off.” At the appointment, my doctor tested my vision. Because of the strokes, my vision was affected, and I have a problem in my field of vision on the right side. I have a deficit with my right side peripheral vision. However, it is getting better. During the test, I told him that I “sense things on the right side of my peripheral vision.” It seems that I know that something is there, but I cannot really distinguish what it is. He told me that there is a body of thought describing phantom vision or phantom blindness. A Polish researcher, L. Bieganowski, described this phantom blindness this way: “The subject of the paper is the phenomenon of phantom vision. It occurs among the blind (or almost blind...

Eye floaters, Strokes, Another ER visit….

It is always something.... I’ve had eye floaters for as long as I can remember. My paternal grandmother had them. My brothers have them too. They’ve always been part of my vision—little drifting specks, threads, and shadows moving across my sight. Over time, you learn to live with them. Sometimes they swirl around, sometimes they settle toward the bottom of your vision, and most of the time you simply ignore them. Floaters are actually tiny clumps inside the eye that cast shadows on the retina. They’re common as we age, especially after fifty, and usually they’re harmless. Doctors will tell you that most people eventually tune them out. But sometimes they change. On Wednesday, while we were driving home from an overnight trip, something felt different. It was my left eye. The floaters suddenly looked darker, heavier, and there were flashes of light along the edge of my vision—almost like a bright crescent moon flickering on and off. At first, I tried to ignore it. After everything ...

Dunham Family and My Stroke Story!

Search This Blog