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Catholic First Grade


Little Ethan Dunham has entered his second week of parochial school filled with the inspirational sweet spirit of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. 

He is excited about the structure. He loves wearing uniforms. He relishes the opportunity to wear socks everyday. He looks forward to tucking in his shirt. And Mass! Wow! It is uplifting and engaging. He rushes home every day to assure his pagan parents that we are well on our way to damnation as he sets the table in anticipation of leading us in the blessing. 

He is overjoyed each morning to awaken – early -- with the knowledge that he has a full day of learning ahead of him. And the fact that he doesn’t know any of the other children in the class (all of whom but one went to Sacred Heart last year for Kindergarten so have their established groups) is not a downer for him at all as he looks forward to the challenge of making new friends at the same time he is adjusting to a different school, a new routine, learning Catholic lessons, and enjoying school lunches for the first time…even as we drive past his old school and friends on the way to the new adventure of Sacred Heart.

Now, the fact that he on occasion has said things such as the following should not give you the wrong impression about his fervor for this new life:

“This is the WORST day of my life.”

“Why do people even wear socks! They are so itchy and I can’t run fast anymore.”

“School is a complete waste of my time.”

“We are NOT going to church on Sunday’s because it will mess up my weekend.”

Included in this post is a picture taken of the future Monsignor Dunham taken just this morning as we tore him away from “Looney Toons” so I could take him to school. This picture is a test however. If you believe the object he is gripping in his sweet little hands (almost poised for prayer) is a Bible, then the first paragraph should resonate with you. If, on the other hand, you believe the object is the more secular Nintendo DS that he played on the way to school in a last ditch effort to have fun and avoid the reality that he has at least 12 more years of school ahead of him, the latter part of this e-mail may be more appropriate.

You be the judge. And executioner as the case may be from his perspective.

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