Dunham Family and My Stroke Story!

I was on the news this week about strokes and rehab. Though I am a private guy, I was asked to share my strokes story because my goal is to help other stroke survivors and their love ones and give them hope.  Here's the segment: http://goo.gl/alerts/Dpex

Why Some Stroke Survivors Struggle With Communication From Health Day April 15, 2013 MONDAY, April 15 (HealthDay News)   A shift of language function to the right side of the brain hampers some stroke survivors from recovering their ability to read, write and to say what they mean, a new study indicates. The inability to do these things is called aphasia, and is caused by damage to the parts of the brain that control language. The study included 27 right-handed adults who survived a stroke in the left side of their brain. Those who recovered from aphasia showed a return to normal patterns of having language function on the left side of the brain, according to the findings in the current issue of the journal Restorative Neurology and Neuroscience. “Overall, approximately 30 percent of patients with stroke suffer from various types of aphasia, with this deficit most common in stroke with left middle cerebral artery territory damage,” lead investigator Dr. ...

The lyrics from the song “Once In A Lifetime” includes the refrain “ Same As It Ever Was” by the Talking Heads. I think of the song often when I realize that our son is getting older. He is almost 10 year’s old but he thinks he is older than his actual age. He wants to do so many “adult” things like driving fast expensive cars, have a great career just to buy “stuff,” and to buy a huge mansion. He talks about "his kids" as well. No mention of a spouse yet!  He is planning his life without a clue about what life entails. I let him wander in his hopes and dreams though we try to make sure that he is grounded in reality. I do not want to shatter his dreams but he need to be realistic about life, expectations, and limits. We caution him to know that money and success are not what life really should be about. Being a good kid when you are 10 years old will make you successful throughout your life: spiritually, financially, physically, and emotionally. But he still ea...

I am a very private person. However, a blog is very public especially when you write things about yourself that might uncomfortable. Talking about depression should not be uncomfortable but it usually is.  In my mind, "Depression" is a dirty secret that people do not talk  about. Especially, me.  However, I have been trying to use my blog to educate people about stroke. Warts and all. "Stroke" is not pretty. Depression is not pretty.  I try to do my blog every week; however, I have not done it for many weeks because I have been very depressed.  " Depression" is common when you have strokes. About 6 weeks ago, I was startled when I realized “this is basically it for my life.” Sure, I get better every day, but I will NEVER be back to what I was before. That is a shattering realization for me. Despite brain scans and doctors, I just assumed I would “back.” There is no going back for me. This is it. Even though I have never really liked ...

Last week I attended the Permanent Building Fund Advisory Council in behalf of the College of Western Idaho where I am a trustee. I came early to listen to several higher education intuitions present their building needs and wishes. I know 4 of the 5 council members and many of their staffers. Before the meeting, many people shook my hand saying “It is great to see you!” One person said, “You are completely normal. You are back! Good for you!” I laughed and said, “I was ‘never’ normal, but, seriously, I will never be the same again.  20% of my brain is dead, and I have residual issues that will never get better. It is what it is.  It could be worse.” My statement was met with stunned silence and then a uncomfortable “Wow! But you seem so normal today.” I said, “This is my new normal. I have issues that people do not even know about, but that is OK. I just try to live my life every day like it would be my last day.” Today at my latest therapy session, ...

On Wednesday afternoon, September 24, 2014, I attended the Saint Alphonsus Rehabilitation Center rededication.   The hospital remodeled the rehabilitation spaces, and it was about a $1,000,000 proj ect. At the dedication, it was announced that it is now called a “Center” rather than just a part of the hospital located on the hospital's 3-West and 4-West floors. It was odd for me to go to the celebration. Throughout my career, I have gone to hundreds of ceremonies like this dedication. I saw people at the dedication who I have known for years. It seemed like I was “there” just because I support so many causes. “Great! Mark Dunham is at the dedication! Of course, he is there because that is what he does to support the community.” I chatted with many people, I ate wonderful hors d'oeuvres, talked with political junkie’s about the upcoming elections, and took a tour of the new remoldeled facilities like the therapy room, the nurses stations, the rooms, and th...

Mark and Ethan Dunham, January 21, 2012 The other day, I talked to my son about my strokes two and a half years ago. Now that he is 9 (going on 20 it seems), I asked him about his reaction when I had my strokes. He was 6 when it happened. I did remember falling in the family room, and he and his mom woke up startled. He said he was half asleep but he does remember yelling “call 911!” After that, it was “kinda of a blur.” He said he was not scared though he hated the hospital.  “The smells were weird.” Mark and Ethan Dunham, January 21, 2012 I asked him if my speech issues (I really could not talk at all) made him feel uncomfortable. “Not really,” he said. However, in realty, he did not talk to me much for a year.  He avoided me. When I would try to watch cartoons with him (a favorite pastime before the strokes), he stiffened. One night in the hospital, my wife told me on a lonely Saturday night, “Get up, get dressed, and do NOT wear sweats. Our son...

Last night after a BSU banquet, when I took off my suit, I found this in my pocket: Mom's funeral program. I haven't worn that suit since my mom's funeral almost 2 years ago. Sad

Great article about two women who had strokes! It reaffirms that friendship and possibilities are endless! http://www.idahostatesman.com/2014/09/14/3374291/two-women-are-lost-then-found.html

I went to a stroke support group this week and it was enlightening. I have been going to that support group often on since my stroke 2 3/4 years ago. There are the "regulars." They are wonderful stroke survivors, and I have gotten to know them pretty well. This week was different. The “regulars” (as I call them) shared their stories. However several new stroke survivors and their caregivers shared their compelling stories. A woman in her mid-40s seems very normal. For the outside world, she seems "just fine" because of her outward appearance. But after the meeting we talked about recovery possibilities and limitations. We both know how people treat us differently since our strokes. Because we look fine, people assume our recovery is complete. We are NOT complete. Until you have a stroke (or two like me!), people just cannot understand the emotions we go through in our daily lives. Another new stroke survivor shared his emotional story. He is very successf...

I went to the Idaho Governors Cup last week in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho. This is a annual event started when Gov. Cecil Andrus started a Idaho scholarship event 40 years ago. Last week, current Governor Butch Otter announced that the event raised $1.25 million for Idaho student scholarships. It was a great event, and I saw so many people I have known through the years. When I started to lobbying when I was 23, I interacted with all of the governors: Andrus, Evans, Batt, Kempthorne, Risch, and Otter. Throughout my career, I have dealt with hundreds of legislators. I have lobbied in Washington, DC with Idaho’s congressional delegation. I have worked with countless mayors, county commissioners, city councils, and university and college presidents. At some point, I was elected twice to be on the College of Western Idaho Board of Trustees. So I am an elected official. Recently, Gov. Otter appointed me to be on the Board of the Idaho Housing and Finance Association which was a shock con...

I took three months off of vision therapy, and I returned this morning. Before my break, my eye doctor and I agreed that I should take a break. After all,  I have been doing all sorts of therapy since my strokes 2 1/2 years ago. I just said, "I'm just so tired." Our fourth-grader started back to school on Wednesday.  This morning I took him to school, and he complained jokingly saying, "I just don't want to go to school!" I told him that we both had the summer off and now we are returning to school.  Amazing but I'm still doing therapy. I'm still "doing school." I believe I have done over 400 sessions of therapy so far.  From kindergarten through college, I excelled in school. But my therapy is the toughest challenge I've ever had.  This morning returning to therapy, I did well. But now I have a massive headache which is expected. I assume when I pick him up after school, he will say, "I am so tired ...