Dunham Family and My Stroke Story!

It is common to lose some relationships after a stroke. Some friends cannot deal with the “new” friend. Some friends are there in the beginning, yet life goes on. The old adage “out of sight and out of mind” is pretty relevant. For the survivor, recovery is every day. For friends, they need to move on. For a survivor, sometimes a sense of paranoia sets in.  Especially when friends do not contact a survivor for weeks at a time. Is it because I am different? Is it because my “new me” is uncomfortable to the “friend?” Five years after my strokes, I seem to be dwelling on what I perceive to be the loss of friendships.  Is it me or is it their lives? I was the organizer of my social group for years. I was the one who would say “Let’s have dinner” or “see a movie” or “let’s have a BBQ.” Since my strokes, the sense of isolation is more palpable than ever.   I did a little experiment. I have some really close friends who I decided not to contact until they reached out to me. S

Recently, I had two “aha moments.” We went to a wedding two weeks ago for two classmates of mine. I met them when we were in junior high. It was the first time I have seen many of my classmates since my strokes. Second, my family was in McCall, Idaho for a science camp. It was the first time I was alone since my strokes. The wedding was just wonderful. The bride and groom reconnected at our 20 th class reunion. They dated ever since. The theme was “FINALLY!”  We are approaching our 40 th class reunion in two years! It was so special for me to see “old” friends. It was even more special that my best friend from junior and high school attended the wedding. He and his wife were so close to me even though college though he went to the Naval Academy and I went to Boise State.  The have now moved back to Idaho living near us. It seemed that the years melted away. The most interesting aspect of the wedding was the reactions about “ME.” One classmate who I met in 7 th grade hug